Body language secrets that will help you understand what people are truly saying

By Daniel Dunder


Even when you don't say a word, people can still learn a lot about what sort of person you are and what you are thinking and feeling. How do others do this? By studying your body language. The term body language refers to the messages you send out with your body gestures and face expressions.

It's quite important to learn non-verbal communication so as to really hear what folks say. Some communication experts claim that between 5-10% of our communicaton is done through the words we speak. The rest of our messages are conveyed through our body language, tone of voice, and face expressions. During your life you've been sending messages to others through your posture, gestures, and face expressions. When you were an infant, before you learned to speak, folk were looking into your tiny baby face, looking at your gestures, and listening to your tiny cries and gurgles, attempting to decode what sort of mood you were in, and what you were trying to say. And you've been reacting to the body language, voice tone, and facial expressions of the people around you all your life, although you might not have been consciously conscious of it.

What types of messages are you conveying to others with your body language? Does your body language encourage other people to approach you? Or do you subconsciously warn them to stay away? Take a second to consider how you usually stand or sit when you are with people. What are you doing with your hands? Where are you looking with your eyes? Does your face express interest in the people you are with, or does your face stay a tense, hard mask? When you are sitting down or standing, do you sometimes cross your arms across your chest? If this is your classic way of standing or sitting, how does one think other people translate this pose? Did you realize that the great majority of people will subconsciously interpret your arms crossed in front of your chest as a signal that you don't want anybody to come up to you? Only the most courageous souls are likely to come forward when you adopt this position.

If you stand roughly, with your chest slumped forward, your shoulders sagging, and your eyes avoiding everyone else, folk are likely to decide you are extremely depressed or totally short of confidence. They may fret that attempting to talk with you will be a ungainly experience. When you stand awkwardly, you do not project any sign that you're assured in yourself, or that you have got any interest in the people around you. Instead you look like you are attempting to vanish. Regardless of how desperately you would like someone to come over and befriend you, if your body language projects disinterest in others, it's not very likely that many people will try and start a dialogue with you.

If some body language signals can frighten people away, are there signals that may inspire people to stand up and approach you? Yes, you can look much more approachable to others if you adopt body language that's open and unthreatening. Whether you are standing or sitting, aim for a posture that is upright and alert, yet relaxed. If you detect that your chest or shoulders are slumping, straighten up. Become privy to the way you are breathing. Does your breath move in and out smoothly? Or does it move with jerky little starts and stops? If you notice you are holding your breath, or inhaling a shallow, jerky demeanour, this is an indication of anxiousness. When you breathe shallowly, you have got to breathe more frequently, which can increase your appearance of anxiousness. Consciously tell all of the muscles of your body to chill. Use your abdomen to help you breathe smoothly and deeply. Let the bottom part of your lungs fill up with air as well as the top. What are you doing with your hands? If you get scared in social eventualities, you'll feel that no matter what you do with your hands, it is the wrong thing. Many people who cross their arms in front of their chest are possibly doing so at least partly because they don't know where else to put their hands.

Stay mindful of and focused on your environment and the people around you. If you find yourself tuning out your surroundings, you will start to focus too strongly on your interior thoughts. This can quickly increase your stress to an exceedingly uncomfortable level. It's important to realize that even when you are not speaking, you're communicating. You wish to ensure that you're sending out the message that you need folks to be receiving. Non-verbal communication is something worth brooding about, and consciously working on improving. It can be a incredible tool, reinforcing what. You need to say, or can lead to confusion it your non-vebal cues aren't supporting the words leaving your mouth.




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