Love and Relationships

Relationship Advice - Are You Lonely in Your Relationship?

It may seem counter-intuitive that you could possibly be lonely within a relationship considered to be intimate, but many people experience this every day. When two people come together who have a very different personality or outlook on life, loneliness can creep in. This doesn't necessarily mean you're with the wrong person, but it could mean that some relationship dynamics are out of whack.

Here are a few signs and symptoms indicating you might be experiencing loneliness:

• Do you feel like you don't have any close friends?
• Do you find that you feel sad when you have to hang out by yourself?
• Do you feel like you don't have a lot in common with the people who are around you?
• Do you feel uncomfortable when you have to spend time alone?
• Do you feel like others don't really care about you?
• Do you feel like you're disconnected from the people around you?
• Do you sometimes feel abandoned, even by those who purport to love you?
• Do you have a hard time connecting with other people, both physically and emotionally?
• Do you feel left out sometimes?
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As you can see, there are several different signs and symptoms for loneliness. These can happen whether or not you're in a relationship. If you feel like you might be experiencing loneliness, the first thing you need to do is talk with your partner about it. He or she may have no idea you're feeling this way. Sometimes, you might be suffering from depression rather than just simple loneliness. There is help for that.

If you don't feel like talking with your partner is an option, or is helping, go and have counseling. You can speak with a psychologist, licensed professional social worker, or even your pastor. The idea is to get your feelings out and find out which tools will help you get over those lonely feelings. There is no reason to go through your life feeling lonely when there are so many people around who really do care about you. If you feel like the people around you really don't care about you, it might be time to get yourself involved in a new circle of friends.

Take some time each day to do things by yourself, so you can get used to that feeling of being alone. Having alone time is not necessarily a negative thing. It just means you have more time with your thoughts.

Learn about yourself... what really makes you feel this way? Are destructive emotions at the heart of any problems you are experiencing with your relationship? What are you telling yourself and why?

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